I guess I'll never be good enough.
They say that a father's most precious gift,
Is his daughter.
Clearly I'm not that one.
Clearly I'm the misfit.
Because I don't belong here.
You don't want me here.
So I'll go away.
And there I'll stay.

But until that day I can escape,
Escape and be free,
Leave me alone, just let me be. Give me a bottle,
to numb the pain,
only until I am free again.

I wanted so badly,
to make you proud,
but it seems to me,
that I've let you and mom down.
I'm sorry for who I am,
what I've become.
Everything I've said,
and everything I've done.

Soon enough, I'll be out on my own.
Out of your life, and all alone.
with only me to worry about,
there is no one to disappoint.
No one to let down,
You can live your perfect life.
I'll just stand here alone.
You can life your perfect life.

You'll never know how many tears I've hidden from you,
Here alone on the dark.
How many times into my wrists,
I've carved my sadness and disappointment.
These scars are here as a reminder
that I'll never be good enough for you.


But until that day I can escape,
Escape and be free,
Leave me alone, just let me be. Give me a bottle,
to numb the pain,
only until I am free again.

Ghosts

Everyone has skeletons in their closet.
secrets the world shouldn't know.
Everyone has skeletons.
Including me.
But what I really want is for these ghosts
to stop haunting me.
You remind me of the good times
and the bad.
I hate you.
I want you to disappear.
leave me alone for good.
you hurt me.
to the point of no return,
and yet for some reason
I still wonder about you.
I won't give in and go back,
I have something so much better now.
but still,
everywhere I turn, there is a reminder of you.
I want to purge my life
of everything that brings back memories of us.
Happy or sad,
because you just bring me down.
I can't do this anymore.
Goodbye haunting memories.
you make me sick to my stomach
, and you can no longer control me.
Go burn in hell.

Best Friend

I've made my mistakes
and fallen flat on my own.
There's scars and hurt,
Number unknown,
I need somebody,
Strong by my side,
someone in whom I can confide.

So hold my hand,
and never let go
wherever we end up,
there's but one way to know.
Life's an adventure
beginning to end,
So hold my hand tight,
I love you, Best friend.

I remember when I came here,
I felt all alone
Didn't know anyone,
I was on my own.
Then my first night
Here we shared,
We stayed up all night,
I know that you cared.

So hold my hand,
and never let go
wherever we end up,
there's but one way to know.
Life's an adventure
beginning to end,
So hold my hand tight,
I love you, Best friend.

Mind Powers Can't Explain How A Man's Mind Works

I couldn't tell exactly what he was thinking, but I tried. The harder I concentrated, the more I could feel the connection between our two brains grow. I’ve learned having mind powers comes in handy from time to time.
An image of what was going on inside his mind was beginning to form in mine, and the first thing that i noticed was his brain was like "1 2 3 4 5 6 SQUIRREL!" when it came to certain urges that involved the female persuasion of his species. I was appalled that he thought about this one thing that much, but come to think of it, it didn't surprise me at all. Not one bit. The male brain is definitely wired differently than the female brain is.
Our minds connected more, and it was almost as if i could lose myself within that complex, but simple mind. Things were going off in there like rapid fire, but not a one of them were connected. It was really strange.
He got an urge to itch, and without even thinking about the fact that he was in public, and there were other people around, he scratched his butt. EW! I can’t believe that just happened. Yet, once again, it didn’t surprise me…men…wow.
He was walking around outside, and granted there was no one around, but there was no reason to do what he did, at least find a bathroom first. He just whipped it out, and went.
Men. Complexly simple creatures that us women, even those with super powers, will NEVER understand.

Point of Opposite View

“Where were you last night?” The woman screeched at her dazed and confused boyfriend. “ I waited for three hours, and you never showed up!”
Realizing that there was no way he could pull out of this one, Carl simply stood there, and took his girlfriend’s verbal thrashing. He said not a word, and just let Catelin get it out of her system. He knew a pressure cooker ready to blow when he saw one, and right now, she was mere moments away from doing so.
“Are you listening to me?” Catelin yelled. “You didn’t hear one word I just said did you? You weren’t even paying attention to me. Carl! If we are going to make this work, we have to listen to each other, more specifically, YOU have to listen to ME.”
Carl turned around and rolled his eyes at her. “This is a relationship, Catelin, not a dictatorship. I am not your slave, and you don’t own me. You never will. Did you ever think that I didn’t show up last night cause I didn’t agree to go out? You made those plans by yourself. You said I was coming, but I didn’t agree to that. You just assumed, so I let you. That’s what happens when you try to have a one way conversation. You don’t understand. So you know what now? I am leaving. I’ll be around. But I am done with you telling me what to do. Treat me like a person, or I’ll treat you like a voice on the wind that no one pays attention to. It’s as simple as that.”
He turned around, and left. Leaving Catelin standing there dazed and confused, wondering what the hell just happened.

Portfolio posts

I will slowly be trying to put everything that i have in my portfolio form all my high school years, writing workshops, and college stuff up on here, so i hope you are looking forward to all this deliciousness.

And...So It Begins...

I'm all moved out. Settled into my new room, with a new roommate and actually loving the college life. Its fun. Great new friends, Fun classes, opportunities popping up every chance I get to meet new people. I have already been asked for my phone number 17 different times, and although I decline most, a few lucky guys make the list. I dont have class friday at all, which is great, if i can find something to do. It'll probably end up being homework... or not. I open a book and the first line says "This book attempts to provide a short history of everybody for the last 13,000 years"

All I can think of is " Dear Sweet JEsus, SAVE ME NOW!!!" why would any one write a book like that? Torture? Insanity? I haven't a clue. But its nerve wracking. I've met 4 people from ACADECA here so far at ISU tho, so I have people to relate to.
but STILL! That book is REDONKULOUS!!!

Its all another page in this book we call life.And I am not the one writing it out. We know who really is.
Peace, love and chocolate~
MallieLynn